How to Identify an Impactful Mentor
I chose one of my most impactful mentors after approximately three days of knowing her. Crazy, right? There was just something about her that caused me to want to learn from her. It has worked out for me so far. She gets me, understands my goals, is good at listening, teaching, providing honest feedback and I can be my whole self with her. I realize that not all millennials have such great fortune when it comes to mentors. I understand because I have had many mentors of varying levels of impact. I am writing this article in hopes that more millennials will be able to identify compassionate leaders to learn from and ultimately help them confidently achieve their goals.
First, there is no limit to how many mentors you can have. I suggest developing a personal board of directors that have a variety of strengths. My mentors are different ages, genders, and ethnicities and have different skillsets and experiences. I often run big decisions or concerns by my most of my board, but then I have my GO TOs for small things as well.
Second, there are different levels to mentorship. In my experience, the levels can range from organic to forced, sounding board to advocate, formal to informal as well as other variations. I am a fan of a more organic mentorship (meaning you are not assigned to your mentor, instead you both make a mutual decision to enter in to the mentoring relationship with each other).
Now that I’ve shared a little bit on my philosophy on mentorship and the varying forms it can take, I want to share what I look for in my mentors.
What I Look For In a Mentor
I look for leaders who:
Are Good at their Job or (something else I want to be good at)– This is multi-layered. I want someone who is knowledgeable, respected and has learned how to navigate the workplace successfully (whether they have the same employer as me or not). You should want someone who is good at their job, partly, so they can help teach you how to be good at your job, but also to make sure you’re getting good guidance from someone who is doing well in ways that you hope to excel. Mentorship is not limited to the workplace. It can be extended to all areas of your life you want to improve upon. Just make sure the person who is mentoring you in that area has achieved some level of success in it.
Are Worth Emulating –There should be something about them you want duplicate. Whether it is developing expertise, the ability to connect with different people of all levels across the company genuinely or simply the ability to stress less. Get mentored by someone who you admire.
Cares About My Development- It is important that your mentor actually cares or will care about your growth. This is why I prefer an organic mentorship to the assigned ones. Everyone will not care, that’s just the truth. But the right one will, and there is gold in that.
Are Available and Willing– Being a mentor is a time commitment. Depending on how you set up your mentorship, you might be meeting for 30 minutes – 1 hour for several weeks or indefinitely. You might have the perfect person in mind to be your mentor, but if they do not have the time or are simply unwilling to help guide you at this time, they will not be as impactful as someone who does have the time and is willing.
Are Honest -I love to share different scenarios with my mentors and get their take on the best way to handle it. This feedback is most valuable when it is honest. I have made better decisions because of the candid feedback of some of my advisors and I am grateful for it.
These are just a few traits on my mentor vetting list, but you should come up with your own list based on your priorities.
How to Identify An Impactful Mentor
My biggest tip on how to identify an impactful mentor applies to potential mentors both inside and outside of your workplace… observe. Look for people who display the characteristics on your list and listen to how people talk about them when they are not around. At least two people on my board from work always had people singing their praises when you mentioned their name. I could not help but think “they must be doing something right”.
Things to Remember About Mentorship
As you work to identify a mentor that is right for you, you should keep in mind a couple of things.
Mentorships are two-way relationships. As your mentor pours into you, you should strive to meet a need for them as well. Initially, you may think you don’t have anything to offer or share with a more experienced professional, but you might be surprised to find out how much you do. Ask your mentor what they are looking to gain from this relationship? Maybe they need a more junior professional’s brain to pick to help plan an activity the whole department will appreciate or they could have technology issues that are simple for you to resolve. Get creative, but at the same time do not force this. Their needs may manifest after meeting with them a while.
Show gratitude for your mentor regularly. They are doing you a huge favor helping to develop and grow you professionally. Find ways to show you are thankful. I am a big fan of handwritten notes, so that is usually my first expression of gratitude, but I also strive to learn what my mentor values. Is it chocolate? If so, easy. Who does not like a free meal every now and then? The possibilities are really endless.
Finally, don’t forget to reach back and pull forward as you grow. Mentor others. You too have something to share.